The Power of Saying "NO" - A New Leadership Article by @MatthewKeller

     I was recently reminded of the power of saying "NO" in a book I'm reading called, Rework. In it, the authors, Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson make the statement:

               "It's easy to say yes. Yes to another feature, yes to an overly optimistic deadline,
               yes to a mediocre design. Soon the stack of things you've said yes to grows so 
               tall you can't even see the things you should really be doing."

     When I read this, I couldn't help but think of so many leaders of church plants and churches. In our desire to build a great church and win people to our cause, too often we find ourselves saying "YES" to things we really should be saying "NO" too.

1.  Saying NO is never easy.

     I'm not going to deceive you into thinking that telling people no is fun or easy or a flippant thing in any way. Just the opposite, it's actually really hard! Especially when your church or organization is small! The last thing in the world you want is for someone to leave because you wouldn't care for their legitimately "good" idea.
   
     However, if we don't protect and fight for the purity of the culture we're trying to create in our churches, we'll end up watering down who we are to such a degree that in the end it does more harm than good.

2.  Saying NO won't make people happy.

     Inevitably, when we say no to someone's "good" idea, someone's feelings will get hurt. People won't always understand why we're making the decision we're making and some will leave mad. This is just a function of the leadership journey. As a leader, making the right decision for your organization is what you get paid to do, and it times it will come with a price.

    However, I have found that most people are pretty understanding when they know the why behind our decision. Not always, but a lot of the time. When we share our logic and heart, people can accept that and move on. It has been my experience that people don't want to be right as much as they simply want to be heard. As leaders, it's our job to listen sincerely, explain our perspective and then make the wise decision for the organization that we ultimately lead.

3.  Saying NO protects you, your family and your organization.

     As our organization has grown, my responsibility to say NO has increased significantly. Because let's face it, in a bigger organization, there's money, facilities and the perception that we could accommodate more "good" things.

     But I have had to learn the art of saying NO in order to protect my family, my schedule, my time, and my energy. Yes I'm a leader, but I'm also still a human being. And I must be wise enough to understand that I'm the only guy who can care for my wife (well, there are others, but we'd all agree, we don't want that!!!) I'm the only guy who can be dad to my 2 boys, and I'm the only guy who can show up every weekend and share life-giving, vision oriented, engaging messages that allow the Holy Spirit to change lives. 

     If I'm not prioritizing those things, then I'm not doing my job. That IS my #1 Priority.

4.  Saying NO allows you to stay focused on what you do best.

     At the end of the day, when you say NO to something "good" you position your organization, your staff and your teams to focus on the best.

     There's something freeing about the word NO. Unfortunately, far too many leaders use it far too infrequently.


Application:  

     If you HAD to identify 3 things that you MUST say no to, what would they be? In the next 24 hours,  do the hard but right thing and say NO to them. In the end, you know you'll feel better about it!

Just a thought,

Matt Keller

Follow the Leader:: A Life Lesson...

     In Leadership, people follow the leader far more than they follow a vision statement, strategy, or bottom line.

     When it comes to leading our organizations, are vision statements, flow charts, spreadsheets and strategies important? Yes, but at the end of the day, what too few executives fail to remember is that...

People Follow People!!!

     Which challenges every one of us who are in a leadership position with 3 questions:

1.  Am I a Leader people can Trust?

     Let's be honest for a second...

           Can your team trust you? Does your team really believe that you have their best interest and the best interest of the organization in mind when you're making leadership decisions? Or do they know that we're secretly in it for our own gain?

            People follow people they can trust. After all, if they take a paycheck from you, then on some level they're trusting the well-being of their family to you. Leadership is a trust. And people follow people they can trust.

2.  Am I a Leader people can Know?

     In our day and age, it's not enough for people to just follow a vision statement or a set of company core values, people want to know the leader they're willingly following. And here in lies the risk.

We must risk being vulnerable. 

     As leaders, we must risk opening up and letting people in. The people we lead want to know us. How we think, what we're feeling, how we process information and how we make decisions. The more our people can know us, the more likely they will be to follow our leadership.

3.  Am I a Leader people can Emulate?

     At the end of the day, people want to follow someone that they want to be like. Of course every person wants to be unique in their personality, their style, etc. But...

When it comes to who we are on the inside, everyone of us are looking for people to emulate. 

     And let's be honest, none of us will follow long-term, someone that we don't want to be like on the inside.
     When we get to know someone more deeply and don't like what we see, over time, we'll begin to pull away from that person. So the challenge for us as leaders is this: Am I living my life and leading in such a way that people will want to emulate what they see? At the end of the day, people follow leaders they can emulate.

     As leaders, we don't have to know everything, but we must know ourselves, because people will follow us far more than they follow our vision statement, strategy, or bottom line.

 Application Question: How am I doing at leading myself well?

How I think about Discouragement - Part 2

#2: Discouragement is Temporary.

The best thing to remember when discouragement hits is that it's not forever! I have adopted a phase that says, "Don't worry, Matt, it won't look like this forever." When I was a kid I used to love watching these painter guy on PBS after school. Inevitably he would start whatever he was painting with some horrible shade of gray or tan. I can remember thinking, "What are you doing? That's gonna look horrible!" But somehow, within a few minutes he had turned that clump of gray into a cool picture.

Discouragement is a snapshot, not a whole picture. When we're in a season of discouragement it's easy to begin thinking that this is the whole picture of your life. What we must remember is that it's just a snapshot, not the whole thing. Don't be too quick to judge your entire life by one snapshot. That would be like summarizing someone's life by their Kindergarten picture. There's no way it could or should be done.

Where have you been tempted to Over-estimate your life in light of a discouraging season you find yourself in?

Just a bloggish thought,

matt